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The Intern Boyfriend
“That #*%@ is seeing someone!” is a subtle post break-up reaction, describing how you’re girlfriend immediately starting dating another dude. Guys limp back to their caucus of single hounds (see the essay, “Cobra!”). more... |
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COBRA!
The worst part about getting dumped - and by “getting dumped” I mean American History X kneel-down and bite the curb dumped - isn’t the abject humiliation; it’s the sudden loss of a scarce etheric mineral: momentum. more... |
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All Single Guys Are Gay
If you’re a woman who chooses to be single, you’re a strong-minded, heroic ode to Ms. Steinem, qualified to wear a gilded “Mary Tyler Moore” hat. If you’re a guy you’re gay. more... |
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A Rationalization for Being a P*ssy
It goes: meeting a stranger at a bar is a waste of time. The evidence reveals: our current courtship system, i.e. the way we “pick-up” one another, is seeped in, and reliant upon, class structure. more... |
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Always Keep One in the Chamber
Lately, I've been spending Sunday nights with a buddy of mine. It's become a ritual. We watch "The Office" on BBC America, frequent various South Bay dining establishments, and discuss a myriad of inane topics ad naseum at a select few area coffee houses. more... |
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3 Uses of the Night
How often do you meet a worthy match at a bar? Rarely. Why? According to the fashion aficionados and dating experts, it’s because you’re not cutting your hair at the right place, wearing the right shoes, or smiling enough. more... |
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Live Nude Marlins
I have a confession to make. Last week at my roommate’s birthday gatherin, I failed all men. Yes, it’s true. I’m not making this up. I failed you, and this is my feeble attempt at absolution. more... |
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Fox's Foxes
With Donahue being thrown off the air, everyone is asking the big question: Can a liberal talk show host make it in primetime? There are talks to bring Al Franken, who I find rather amusing at times, to the airwaves to combat the likes of Rush Limbaugh, Bill O’Reilly, and Sean Hannity. more... |
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Open Season
It's that time of year again. The weeks following Valentine's Day are like the Monday after Thanksgiving. In other words, it's open season.
Of all the major relationships in my life, they all, well alright, they both started in the month of the March. more... |
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Pauper Charming
I've started a relationship with a homeless man. As we don't even know each others' names, it is, admittedly, about as deep as a freshman term paper but the wistful exchange of knowing nods of the head is proof to me that something is brewing. more... |
